The mommas have found the internets

I am loving the site "Postcards from Yo Momma." Check it out...it's instant message chats, emails, and texts from mothers to their adult kids (mostly daughters). Here are a few that got me giggling:

Me: I’m piercing my nose
Mom: Fine, I’m not raising your illegitimate children.
Me: What?
Mom: You’ll pierce your nose, get a trashy boyfriend and end up with illegitimate children. You and your trashy boyfriend are not living in my house, and neither are your kids.
Me: Wow mom, thanks for the credit. Clearly that’s the natural progression after piercing your nose.

Mom: So when we come to Sydney can we stay at yours?
Mom: Hello?
Me: Oh. Sure. Well, actually there are a number of awesome hotels just a two minute walk from my house. I’ve just emailed you a bunch of links. Have a look! Am happy to book any of them for you. But, yeah, of course you are welcome to stay at mine, if you really want to.
Me: Mom?
Mom: You were welcome to stay in my uterus for nine months, and then my house for 17 years. But I understand, a week at your apartment might be a bit … much.
Me: Don’t you passive-aggressive-smile-face-ME, woman.

Friday I’m doing something fun as well. Joan and I are starting a club called The Grown-Ass Woman’s Club. Our mascot is Gert Boyle (One Tough Mother) from Columbia Wear. Your stepfather is making fun of us but I think he’s just petty and jealous. I finally told him to shut up. That’s what GAW do when they are confronted with negativity. One of our field trips is going to be on a Saturday and we’re going to find those Red Hat Ladies and shove them down. They’re ridiculous and need to be eliminated.

Backstory: Two nights before my wedding mom thinks we need to have “the talk”.
Honey,
I just want to let you know that if you have any, you know, QUESTIONS, you can ask me anything. Your father isn’t the best lover in the world, so I also know a lot about toys. Let’s get dinner tonight.
Love,
Mom

Mom: How do I unfriend on Facebook?
Me: What, you only have like 8 friends, who do you want to get rid of.
Mom: That’s really none of your business, and I have 40 friends thank you very much.
Me: That’s right, Dad has 8 heheh
Mom: Not for long!

You'll be ROTFL (ask your mom what it means) if you click the "sex" tag in the cloud on the main page.