Harrison Ford is more macho than Steve Carell

No squeals of "Kelly Clarkson" from Han Solo!

Campaign photos

Awkward or just plain ugly, here are some of the worst campaign photos from the 2008 election cycle.

Clustered around the exit sign

The Field's Al Giordano tosses out two intriguing tidbits:

1. Senator Clinton has made direct and private overtures to Senator Obama regarding the path ahead.

2. Keep your eye on superdelegates, particularly in California, but also elsewhere, that had committed to Senator Clinton, but who are gathering together by the exit sign.

Meanwhile, David Yepsen deconstructs last night's Iowa speech by Obama, and the LA Times reports that Hillary is way, way, way in the red.

And for fun, here's Wonkette's liveblog of the Iowa speech last night. Here's an excerpt:

10:21 — He shouts that he has the necessary pledged delegates for the Democratic nomination, hurrah! Doesn't he know that the Clinton team has changed the clinching number from 2,025 to "I kill you"?
10:22 — Now he's saying how much he respects Hilz. She is a very formidable fighter and has done some good stuff before with her husband, the President. God, he must have had six or seven Nicorettes before this speech.

ECW and WWE Smackdown Results Des Moines, Iowa 5/20/2008

ECW Results:

The Miz defeated Kane when Kane was disqualified for refusing to release a choke hold while Miz hung in the tree of woe.

Shelton Benjamin defeated Kofi Kingston.

In a mixed tag match, Kelly Kelly and Colin Delaney defeated Mike Knox and Layla when Kelly pinned Layla. Armando Estrada then entered the ring to declare a match against a winded Delaney and scored an immediate pin.

Chavo Guerrero and John Morrison scored a tag win over CM Punk and Tommy Dreamer when Guerrero pinned Dreamer. The Big Show then entered the ring and choke-slammed all four competitors. Show then declared he'd be joining the four men in the ring in a Singapore Cane match at "One Night Stand" in order to determine who would wrestle for the ECW championship at "Night Of Champions."

Smackdown results:

Vicki Guerrero announced that Undertaker would face Edge at One Night Only in a tables, ladders, and chairs match for the World Championship. She specified that Undertaker would be banished from the WWE if he lost.

Domino, Deuce, and Maryse scored a win over the team of Jesse, Festus, and Cherry when Maryse pinned Cherry.

MVP "interviewed" Teddy Long by continually insulting him. Batista hit the ring and destroyed the lounge. MVP ran to the back and demanded justice from Vicki Guererro--she declared a match between MVP and Batista later in the show.

Finley defeated Chuck Polumbo when Hornswoggle spit green mist into the eyes of Polumbo and Finley followed with a whack to Polumbo's skull with the shillelagh.

Batista over MVP with the Batista bomb.

Vladimir Kozlov over Nunzio in a squash.

Matt Hardy and Kofi Kingston over Elijah Burke and Shelton Benjamin when Kingston pinned Benjamin after a buzzsaw.

Undertaker over Chavo Guerrero with a tombstone piledriver. After "la familia" tried to administer a post-match beat down to Undertaker, Kane hit the ring to assist 'Taker. Undertaker hit a choke slam on Edge and Kane hit another tombstone on Chavo.

Barack rocks Des Moines

Another wonderful speech from my guy, back in my state for the first time in months. What a charmer. An excerpt, and a message of unity:

The road here has been long, and that is partly because we've traveled it with one of the most formidable candidates to ever run for this office. In her thirty-five years of public service, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton has never given up on her fight for the American people, and tonight I congratulate her on her victory in Kentucky. We have had our disagreements during this campaign, but we all admire her courage, her commitment and her perseverance. No matter how this primary ends, Senator Clinton has shattered myths and broken barriers and changed the America in which my daughters and yours will come of age.

Some may see the millions upon millions of votes cast for each of us as evidence that our party is divided, but I see it as proof that we have never been more energized and united in our desire to take this country in a new direction. More than anything, we need this unity and this energy in the months to come, because while our primary has been long and hard-fought, the hardest and most important part of our journey still lies ahead.

75,000 people do NOT turn out for Nader in D.C.

Ralph Nader had a rally.

It Comes Down To A Handful Of States

Last week, we told you to disregard national polls and take a look at the presidential race state-by-state. Through the effect called "serendipity," ABC News has obtained an electoral college map put together by Karl Rove's firm.

If the red states remain red states and the blue states blue, the race comes down to a handful of states: Iowa, North Dakota, Nebraska, Colorado, New Mexico, Michigan, Ohio, and Virginia. That's where McCain and Obama will devote their time and resources--unless things start to slip in a state where a particular candidate expects to win.

Byrd in Obama's words

Senator Robert Byrd of West Virginia has endorsed Barack Obama. Ben Smith shares an excerpt from Obama's book, about the first time these two articulate Senators met:

Senator Byrd's life—like most of ours—has been the struggle of warring impulses, a twining of darkness and light. And in that sense I realized that he really was a proper emblem for the Senate, whose rules and design reflect the grand compromise of America's founding: the bargain between Northern states and Southern states, the Senate's role as a guardian against the passions of the moment, a defender of minority rights and state sovereignty, but also a tool to protect the wealthy from the rabble, and assure slaveholders of noninterference with their peculiar institution. Stamped into the very fiber of the Senate, within its genetic code, was the same contest between power and principle that characterized America as a whole, a lasting expression of that great debate among a few brilliant, flawed men that had concluded with the creation of a form of government unique in its genius—yet blind to the whip and the chain.

Obama's writing always makes me slow down and take notice.

Monday To Do List: make to-do list

My girlfriend Rose is moving from Texas to Boston, and had this little tidbit of advice to share today. I like it:

I just made a To Do List of all the things I need to do in the days before I leave Houston. My high school English teacher always said that the first thing you put on a To Do List when you're making it should always be, "Make a To Do List." That way, you can always immediately cross something off. :)

75,000 people turn out for Obama in Oregon

Wow. Wow, wow, wow.

Tomorrow night's Des Moines. I wonder how many people he will draw here? I can't go, unfortunately, because it's the night of my daughter's middle school orientation.

[Note...it's not as hard as "Where's Waldo." Obama is the black guy.]

Jeff's wildest fantasy...

came true today, but in the wrong state.

Next time the Double-Stuf (yes, one "F") Oreo truck tips over, he's hoping it will be right here on interstate 35.

No word on the milk truck that was following the 14 tons of Oreos.

Tasers...To The Death...No: To The Pain!

They both needed a change of pants afterward, but no one went to the hospital after two men shot each other with tasers over a parking dispute in Boulder, Colorado.

CNN reports it began when the co-owner of "Mamacitas" restaurant, Harvey Epstein, tried to use bolt cutters on a metal boot that had been placed on a van parked behind the restaurant.

A police report said Epstein and Casey M. Dane, a supervisor for Colorado Security Services Inc., were arguing over a metal boot that one of Dane's guards had clamped on a wheel of a van parked behind Mamacitas.

Dane told police he was afraid Epstein was going to hit him with a 2-foot-long pair of bolt cutters. Epstein told police he had only tried to remove the boot with the bolt cutters and hadn't threatened anyone with them.

In what one officer described as a "bonehead deal," both men drew tasers and fired.

Epstein has been charged with "felony menacing," a charge that I didn't know existed but sure sounds macho. If I were charged like that, I'd probably get a t-shirt that proclaimed: "Warning: I engage in felony menacing."

It's a duel that Westley of "The Princess Bride" would have appreciated.

Prince Humperdinck: First things first, to the death.
Westley: No. To the pain.
Prince Humperdinck: I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase.
Westley: I'll explain and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog faced buffoon.
Prince Humperdinck: That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me.
Westley: It won't be the last. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose.
Prince Humperdinck: And then my tongue I suppose, I killed you too quickly the last time. A mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight.
Westley: I wasn't finished. The next thing you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right.
Prince Humperdinck: And then my ears, I understand let's get on with it.
Westley: WRONG. Your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear God! What is that thing," will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.

Hooray for California

In honor of the momentous decision from the California Supreme Court yesterday, here are a few links to my reactions to Iowa's brief foray into legalized gay marriage:

My friends' marriage license.

My friends' wedding.

What marriage means to me.

They're Baaaaack! Flying Saucers!

Just in time for the release of secret British UFO documents, and in answer to Tara's question ("why did all the good UFO sightings take place in the 70s?")...the British tabloid "The Sun" prints a honest-to-goodness-might-be-a picture of flying saucers!

Sure, it might just look like light refraction to me and you...but watch for reports of rampant probing in the next few weeks!

John Edwards Puzzles Activists

John Edwards took to the "Today" show to say two things that must be making savvy Democrats scratch their heads. He's not interested in a VP slot with Obama...and his endorsement was NOT timed to blunt Hillary's momentum after her West Virginia win.

Here's one advantage of an Edwards VP candidacy: folks could just put an "Obama" sticker over the word "Kerry" on the bumper sticker they're still sporting on their Prius rather than opt for a whole new sticker. Economical and environmentally friendly!

It's The 50th Anniversary Of "The Music Man"

Tara previously posted about son Logan's performance in "The Music Man" at Creston Middle School. Meredith Willson's hometown of Mason City is preparing to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the musical's opening on Broadway.

Yes, there will be a parade featuring 76 trombones. The festival runs from May 22-25 and features two free showings of the film at 5 p.m. Saturday and 2 p.m. Sunday at (where else?) "Music Man Square."

How Close Will The 2008 Elections Be?

Democrats crowing about a landslide and Republicans wringing their hands like its 1974 ought to take a look at this chart. This is why you ignore national polling and look at races on a state-by-state basis.

Currently, the chart does have Barack Obama winning the presidency over John McCain by an electoral count of 274-264. That's achieved by putting Iowa and Minnesota in the Obama column.

A state-by-state review of House and Senate races results in a prediction of a Democratic pick-up of four seats in each chamber.

And it's May, people. Work...that....TURN-OUT!